Alive and Kicking

If I were to make an ad on kaar today, it would go something like...

What's it called? An ECG. So the screen of the ECG shows (with all sides and corners blurred to add to the dramatization). A straight line runs right across the screen, without even a sign of a sign of a sign of a sign of a sign of a dent. That's how lifeless you are supposed to think Kaar is.

But you know it's not dead. You just know. Thats when they show a couple of 'doctors', with a set of spanners, rather than tweezers and scissors, trying to reinvigorate the beast. You see those...'shocks'...you hear a vrooooo...um!

You hear another vrooo...um! It's struggling to find life, but it's there or there abouts. You hear the vroo..um another couple of times, but then...it goes vroooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooom.

That's when you start hearing some good-hope-brought-soundtrack, something like the one they ran in the intro of Commandos (Men of Courage). Kaar is alive and kicking again!

Ready to bear that onus of bringing innovation towards a fuel efficient future, towards the dream we call Pakistan-a-developed-country. These are far-off objectives and our part in getting there is small, but we live and work with the satisfaction of never having to regret that we didn't try.

More Quotes

"Aap gari bananay say ab khaana bananay par agaye hain?"
A cousin, in the aftermath of the Shell Eco Marathon.

"Mamoo! Hum nay bhi Malaysia jana hai!"
Aabis and Farzaan, Senor Mujahid's nephews.

"Our ambitions are much higher!"
Deriding Bekaar, Col Khattak (Supervisor of Pakwheelers) to Commandant in Sepang. His team managed to collect the second-to-highest amount of garbage at the circuit.

"50 Ringgits"
"5 Ringgits!"
"Go **** a dog!"
Some woman on a street in Brickfield.

"50 Ringgits"
"5 Ringgits!"
"Go **** yourself!"
Another woman, on the same street I guess.

"Come on Kaar!!!"
James May, TopGear host. Or did he say 'car'?

Memorable Quotes

A small collection of memorable quotes on Kaar and Bekaar. Some weren't very nice, one more reason I didn't manage to forget them.

"Gari nahi banti! Leadership he nahi hai"
Kaar's Captain Barbossa

"Gari? Nahi banti, aur bolo"
Some professor at College

"Tum? Hahahahahahahaha!"
Good friend, Hammad Zaidi. I guess he was only joking, and had complete faith in my uselessness.

"If we sponsor you, Bekaar would have to go."
The marketing guy from Indus Motors.

"Ay dekho! Dunya kahan say kahan pohunch gayi hai, aur inhon ne ye daddoo banaya hai"
(Look at this! The world has moved ahead, and all they have done is make this frog!)
One of the catering guys at college mess.

"Kya Bekaar ka wohi matlab hai jo Hindi main hota hai?"
(Does Bekaar have the same meaning as it does in Hindi?)
Some guy from an Indian team at SIC Malaysia.

"Waisay 'Bekaar' humain ziada suit karta hai."
('Bekaar' suits us more!)
Some guy from an India team. Don't know if it was the same guy.

"Creative!"
Faria Syed, of The Express Tribune, at the Sending Off Ceremony in May.

The Automotive Research Group

Back to the present then...

After the supposed debacle in Sepang, there was much activity here as previous participants set out to right the wrongs, and new aspirants arose to start (another) revolution. With EME College buzzing with 'Shell Eco Marathon', someone came up with the Automotive Research Group, a group formed to look after events like these, and more, and in the larger picture, play a role in uplifting the automotive fortunes of the country.

Because we don't even make cars, having them go green is pointless. In this spirit, this blog will remain green (at the top, literally) and will also go grey, and black, and blue, and silver, and yellow, and red, and...

Morsels of Triumph

In all my complaining, ranting and burlesquing, if you think that all we got from the experience was experience, then you are mistaken.

Let me round of this reverie with revellations. Good ones.

We are proud to acknowledge...let me say this again. We are proud to acknowledge...and again. We are proud to acknowledge that Kaar, or to me more apposite, the chassis of Kaar was nominated for the Autodesk Technical Innovation Award in Malaysia. They said it was an Early Registration Award, but how late can you get than sending the package after the deadline, and over 6 months after the registration begin? So let's all assume that the award recognizes the technical innovation aspect of Kaar.

Eerily (and I say this with dripping sarcasm, because it was not eerie but an act of brusque outrage) the Supervisor of another team (any guesses? I'll give you a clue: from our own college, their car in black and orange, urbanconcept category...) asked a member of his own team to get to the stage and 'take the honors'. Take the shame rather. I was going to write 'Suck on that! *TEAM NAME*' at the end of the last paragraph, but those guys don't need any invitation.

Anyway, below, Hassaan Ali takes the Award on our behalf. (Kaar's behalf to keep matters straight).

On another front, Kaar - as the business idea in INVENT, the entrepreneurship competition organized by IBA Karachi - was selected among the top 15 ideas on a national level.

Sadly, the organizers went back on another round of competition, that would have given us an even better chance to get our hands on the Rs. 500,000 prize-money, and we had to settle for - lets call it - a 6th place finish, and prize money of Rs. 50,000.

The material gains don't really signfy a gratifying return from all our effort, but will do as a nice appetizer. It's the full course meal we are after for next time.

The Fall Out

Back, but blatantly ostrasized. Initially, that is. Don't know what the college's administration people were thinking when they supposedly banned all those who had been to Malaysia for the Shell Eco Marathon. I am remided of a line from 'A case of exploding mangoes' by Muhammad Hanif. He says, "You can blame our men in uniform for anything, but you can never blame them for being imaginative."

Enough rant already.

Thing is I can not defend the debacle in Malaysia for the sheer number of vehicles bore Pakistan's flag. I am hearing defences from here and there arguing that it was only the first time. Hell it was, but it was also the first time for everyone else. For the Indonesian team that did 237 km/L. For the Japs. The Chinese. Everyone.

Logically I should also put my head down with shame, and disappear somewhere, but that is not going to happen. The thing is also that there can be no substitute for the hands-on learning the SEM experience provided. The thing is that such moments are to serve as lessons. To stimulate us further in pursuit of the greater good.

Ban? Sit back, and live the rest of my engineering degree in peace? *SNORT* you bet!

Been there, done what?

(excuse the dismissive tone of this post; our Kaar is also part of this expedition)

80 teams, 80 cars from Asia. 20 from Pakistan!

You would think that this place is the craddle of Asia'a automotive industry. Some Maranello or Stuttgart, where they make Ferraris and Porsches and Mercedes and BMWs.

Truth is, they don't make a single production car in Pakistan. They tried making one, the Adam Revo...but its bubble burst well before it could stimulate a revolution. They tried making Suzukis via a technology-transfer agreement, but that flopped too. So what were twently 'fuel efficient' cars from Pakistan doing at the Shell Eco Marathon?

I am thinking of uploading pictures, with captious - you would be surprized how many such words they put in the GRE book - quips, but spare me that effort. That just one of those 20 managed to complete a valid run of the track suffices to indicate the difference between quality and quantity. China sent just one team (or maybe two) and those pandas crossed the 1000 km/L barrier.

Pakistan's one team that did complete the track did a breath-taking 53 km/L.

So the question is, what are we doing? Are we really making road-worthy - or even Shell Eco Marathon worthy - cars, or are we rolling up fiberglass on aluminum and hoping it works?

I don't know about the vehicles from other countries, but for us - maybe there were exceptions, but we weren't among them - the ratio of engineering to mechanicy stand at an unfavorable location. While one may doubt the caliber of Pakistani students, I am dead sure that there are two things wrong in the whole process. First, there is a little bug in our programming: For us, competition is all about going to Malaysia. Well, its not. I like to see F1 as something on which we can model our participation in Shell Eco Marathon. The best teams win. The not-so-best teams fight and try to get better. They compete in the long run. You can make a fuel efficient idea in a second, but fuel efficient vehicles will take years to mature (If hybrid was so easy and charming, Fords and Fiats would have their hybrids everywhere). Blah Blah Blah.

Second, in Project Kaar at least, I noticed that the engineering part - that we did - worked. I have come to conclude that engineering~planning~works. Mechanics find solutions that cause another problem. Their solution to the next problem causes another one. The cycle continues. In short: plan and trust yourself.

Enough patronizing. Now, get the hell out of here!

SEMA 2010: Of Kaar and Bekaar - 3

The Shell Eco Marathon Asia 2010 brought an end to a terrific - and tumultous - camaraderie. The octet with little in commom but one goal of Kaar deserve, despite the ups and downs, a parting salute (not that all of us will literally disperse and all). Here is to the year and all the hard work.

Naturally, I should begin with my picture. Because I am the most important person on earth. But then, everyone would say, kya pagal hai, itni gandi tasweer laga di hai sub say uuper. And anyway, I was probably away sulking at something.

So, we begin with our Supervisor, Fareed Sahab, who we never knew...no, no...he provided us with lots of moral encouragement, technical support, even sponsors. The best supervisor ever! Pity I don't have any of his snaps alone. He might not have liked it anyway.
When the chips were down, in front stepped Sohaib. As in, literally (in the picture below). In turbulent times, Sohaib conducted the opera in a high-visibility shirt and a Ferreli helmet.

'Watch out for the five red lights at the top of your screen...and savor the sound of these V-8s...and here we go...'

Ossama in the lead, in a Pakistani flag!!!

The guy with solutions to everything. Chipping in with another role as reserve driver. That involved the hefty task of sliding into the coolest racing suit ever (which we borrowed from someone). The Kamal ka banda.

Shell Eco Marathon vehicles do a mere 40 kph at the most, and Kaar didn't even do that on track. But who says the drivers therein are not in demand? Senor Mujahid with ample proof.

This picture might have been a representative one had food in Malaysia been any good. Malik sahab engrossed in one of the things he does best.

Senor Raheel looks, for the umpteenth time at his creation. Shining. Wah jee wah, kya baat hai teri.

In the background of Bekaar, the Pakistani flag (with jashn-e-Azadi written on it, despite a whole month from the day) and a team of Chipmunks from Singapore, Senor Anas looks on. Ever smiling. We might have failed (in a shallow perspective) but all hope is not lost. Saad bin Fareed is all set and ready to bear the onus in coming years. Witness the future of Bekaar!

SEMA 2010: Of Kaar and Bekaar - 2

Having come all the way from Pakistan, it would have been such a shame if those nobodys - Schumacher, Riakonnen, Massa, Hamilton, Alonso, Barrichello and company - wouldn't be able to brag about having touched the same tarmac graced by Kaar.